- Tell your toddler that not sharing may mean his friends will not want to share with him either.
- If your toddler doesn’t want to share, explain why it’s important to share.
- Take the toys in question away; if your toddler doesn’t want to share – then no one will play with the toys.
- Never yell at the toddler, but be firm in your reprimands. Yelling rarely gets you anywhere and does not set a good example.
- If your toddler screams and carries on; give the toddler a time out, or what I like to do is a time in and sit down with your child, talk to him or her and make sure there is not really some other issue that is causing the problem.
- Thank your child for sharing his toys with others.
- Teach your toddler to think of others and how happy it makes them when they share their toys.
- If other toddlers are invited over, ask your toddler to pick out some toys to put away. But also remind him the toys left out can be shared with everyone.
- Teach by example; show your child how you are willing to share something you own.
- Finally, start very young. When my youngest was just a few months old and could sit up we would start playing a game. I would give him a toy and whenever he gave it back I would smile profusely, say ‘thankyou’ and give it back to him. Now when we are playing together he routinely shares his toys with me and his big brother.
How do I teach my toddler to share?
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Lead with example first — kids learn by watching, so let your child see you sharing with others. From there, keep it gentle and concrete: explain why sharing matters, gently point out that friends may not share back if they don’t, and thank your child warmly every time they do share. Yelling rarely works; calm, firm guidance does.
What should I do when my toddler refuses to share?
Stay calm and firm rather than raising your voice. You can let your toddler know the toy gets put away if no one can share it, or try a “time in” — sitting down together to talk it through and check whether something else is really bothering them. Often the refusal is about a bigger feeling, and a little connection helps more than a punishment.
When should I start teaching my child to share?
You can start surprisingly young. The piece describes a simple game with a baby just old enough to sit up: hand them a toy, and every time they give it back, smile big and say “thank you.” Over time that playful back-and-forth grows into a child who naturally shares with you and their siblings.
What if nothing seems to work?
Take heart — not sharing is very often just a stage your toddler will outgrow. Keep gently modeling generosity and try not to over-give, like buying a present every time another child gets one. The goal is simply to keep planting the idea that sharing and caring for others feels good.
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