In today’s world, parenting is becoming an increasingly difficult task. Our ever-changing lifestyles, technological advancements, heavy financial responsibilities, and demanding schedules result in numerous challenges to parents. Balancing work, household responsibilities, finances, and children has the potential to wear on any parent. Despite the obstacles that we currently face as parents, our main priority and responsibility is our children. Parenting is the process and act of both promoting and supporting the various levels of development of a child from the time that they are born until the time that they reach adulthood; it is not simply a biological-based relationship. The various stages of development include the physiological, psychological, intellectual, social, and financial. As a parent, we must nurture and educate. In this comprehensive parenting guide, you will learn about teaching your children. You must pass on your experiences in life to ensure that your child’s life is positive and productive. Here, you will learn about the 10 things that I want to teach my child. If you are a parent, you should consider teaching your child the same.
The Foundation of Success in Teaching Values to Our Kids
Before delving into the 10 things that I feel that every child should learn from their parents, I feel that it is first important to teach YOU the foundation of success as it relates to teaching values to our kids. First and foremost, it is essential that you take the time to personally absorb all of the values that you are attempting to instill in your children and then model the values in their presence. When educating your children on the values that you will be introduced to in this guide, it is important to understand that the learning process IS a process. Children often have short-term memories. It will take a lot of modeling the behaviors and reminders in order to truly impact the long-term behaviors of the child in a positive manner. Our kids will automatically absorb what we DO more quickly than what we SAY. If we attempt to teach our kids the values in this positive parenting guide, we must first know those values and practice them ourselves. By doing, our children will listen. When our children listen, they will learn. As they continue to learn, they will absorb the values that we are attempting to instill in them. This is, by far, the most successful foundation when it comes to teaching our kids.
The first and most important thing that I want to teach my child is to take 100% responsibility for themselves and all that happens in their life. I first learned of this concept in the book, “The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be” by Jack Canfield. While, somewhere in this brain of mine, I knew this was the RIGHT way to live, before I read this book, I often found myself blaming things that I felt were out of my control for the situations and events that I faced in my life. Of course, I was always miserable. Then, I learned that, in order to be personally fulfilled and achieve success in my life, it was critical that I accept 100% responsibility for myself and the things that I experience in life. Since practicing this, I have a whole new take on things. I simply want my child to know that they must acknowledge that they are the ones that create everything that happens to them and that they are the cause of all in which they experience at an early age.
The next thing that I would like to teach my child is respect. Respect for himself and respect for others. In order to do this with your child, you must first understand that most of us fail to give our child the type of respect that we are demanding. One of the most effective strategies that parents may use is to take time to listen to a child. Display a genuine interest in them and allow them to see you displaying a genuine interest in others. Make the child feel as if the ideas that they have and their opinions are valued. This is how my parents taught me respect and I feel it is important that my child experiences the same lesson in order to learn respect. Look for every opportunity to talk with your child and engage with your child in such a way that they come to realize that what they say and/or do is highly important to you!
The third thing that I would like to teach my child is how to be kind to themselves and others. We have ALL stumbled across miserable people in our lives. These are the people that drain us emotionally and hurt us on a psychological level. In some instances, these misers hurt us in a physical way. We have also ran into kind people in our lives. These are the ones that lift you up, motivate you, support you, and make you feel great about life. I want to teach my child that, no matter what, be the person that lifts up others and makes them feel good – not the person that hurts those that they come in contact with throughout their life. The best parenting method for teaching kindness is to show kindness to our children. While there will be situations that will make you feel as if being kind is the last thing you want to do, if your child is listening and/or watching, always exhibit the most positive responses to others as possible.
If there is one thing that absolutely frustrates me it is dishonesty. It does not matter if it is a dishonest neighbor, coworker, friend, or family member. I want to be able to feel a certain degree of trust with those that I interact with in my life – including my child. I commit to being honest with my kid and I expect the same respect. It does not matter how much the truth hurts, I have found that a lie is always more painful. I want my child to know this and practice being as honest as possible throughout their lives. The best way to teach honesty is to display honesty. Additionally, honesty should be rewarded or acknowledged, to some extent. For example, if a child breaks your favorite ceramic figurine and admits you, you should explain that, while you are disappointed that this happened, you are proud of them for telling the truth.
Parenting involves a certain sense of humility. In fact, all facets of life involve a certain level of humility. In light of this fact, I want to teach my child to be humble. I feel it is essential that they know and understand their place and have a respect for that. Furthermore, I feel that humility is an essential component of self-acceptance because of the fact that we are all flawed, to some degree. It is much more acceptable and amicable to be humble than to exhibit high levels of pride.
The next thing that I want to teach my child is dependability. This is the act of fulfilling obligations or what is promised, despite the fact that it may result in personal sacrifices. Dependability means that others are able to count on you. It often results in respect and other forms of positive recognition. In a world where children and adults alike are consistently distracted, dependability is becoming increasingly scarce. As a child, I was taught that being dependable is one of the most important traits. I want my child to know this fact, too. I consider myself dependable. My kid sees me as dependable. Due to the fact that I model this behavior, my child should be able to pick up on this very easily.
When it comes to those values that I wish to instill in my child, compassion is on my top 10 list. Not only is a compassionate child less likely to engage in verbal, physical, and/or emotional forms of aggression, but, they are typically well-received by those around them. Compassionate kids have a genuine interest in themselves, others, and the world around them. It is not only a highly honorable character trait, but, it is also a behavioral style that is sure to lead to happiness. Parenting a compassionate child is a highly rewarding endeavor. By taking the time to teach compassion, you will experience more compassion in your life. In my opinion, there is nothing quite like seeing and experiencing the world through the eyes of a compassionate child.
Generosity is a principle and a value that has the potential to be life-changing. I want my child to know that it is much better and more rewarding to give than to receive. I want them to know that the way they expect others to treat them should be the way that they treat those people. I want them to know that giving of themselves, giving of their time, giving of their money, and giving of their love matter the most. A generous child is a happy child. A happy child grows into a happy, giving adult that is well liked by many!
Perseverance is the unique act or the basic quality of keeping on keeping on to a particular action, a certain belief, or a specific purpose, despite any and all forms of opposition and/or discouragement. It means to never give up or to never give in, despite any obstacles. I want to teach my child perseverance. There are numerous ways to do this. Examples are as follows:
- I could instruct my child to always attempt to do their very best, regardless of how difficult the situation.
- I could encourage them to always strive for the highest level of excellence.
- I could express the overall importance of sticking with a particular task until it is completely finished.
- I could teach them that all efforts should be done with a high level of patience and in a continuous manner.
- I could teach them that goals are essential and once made, all focus should be placed on those goals.
The tenth and final value on my top 10 list that I want to teach my child is self-discipline. This comes in a wide assortment of forms; however, ultimately, it is having a high level of self-control and the unique ability to avoid situations, people, and events that could result in the onset of consequences that are negative. Kids that have a high level of self-discipline are kids that do not care about experiencing instant forms of gratification or instant forms of pleasure. They do not mind the time and effort that is required to experience more personally satisfying results. It is, in my opinion, one of the best expressions of inner strength, courage, and power.
Parenting is more than just telling a child what to do and how it should be done. Parenting is a consistent course of action that guides your child. It is essential to understand that children will do what you do, not what you say. Even if you were to attempt to repeat all of the instructions pertaining to the values in this parenting guide on a consistent basis, the child will not adhere to expectations he is unable to understand. You must first model that which you want to teach your child. In doing so, your child will learn how to act in ways that you desire and ways that are considered to be socially appropriate. As a parent, I feel that it is imperative that you work to instill all of the values I have outlined in this guide in your child. Not only will you find that your child is highly regarded by others, you will discover that your child is able to become a healthy, positive, and highly responsible adult.
One last thing to remember is kids are like a mirror, what they hear and see they tend to do. So be a good reflection for them 🙂