Parenting Manaʻo makua

Nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo makua i kēlā me kēia lā: Ke aʻo ʻana i nā keiki i ka manaʻo ponoʻī

Eia kā mākou ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo makua i kēlā me kēia lā no ka pule e hiki mai ana. Ke aʻo nei kēia kumuhana pule i nā keiki i ka manaʻo ponoʻī...

Māmā e pūliki ana i ke kaikamahine no kahi hana i hana maikaʻi ʻiaʻO ke kī i ka holomua ka manaʻo ponoʻī. Inā ʻaʻole manaʻo kekahi kanaka hiki iā ia ke hana i kekahi mea, a i ʻole hoʻokō i kekahi mea a laila ʻaʻole ia e hana. ʻO kekahi o nā mea nui e hiki iā ʻoe ke hana no kāu keiki, ʻo ia ke aʻo ʻana iā lākou pehea e loaʻa ai ka mahalo iā ia iho. Hiki i nā keiki a i ʻole nā ​​ʻōpio me ka manaʻo kiʻekiʻe ke lawe i ke kuleana, hana kūʻokoʻa, haʻaheo i kāna mau hana, hoʻāʻo i nā mea hou, hāʻawi kōkua i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe a hiki iā lākou ke lawe i nā manaʻo maikaʻi a maikaʻi ʻole.

ʻAʻole e hoʻāʻo nā keiki a me nā ʻōpio me ka manaʻo haʻahaʻa iā lākou iho i nā mea hou, manaʻo lākou ʻaʻole i aloha ʻia a makemake ʻole ʻia, hoʻopiʻi lākou i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe no ko lākou mau hemahema ponoʻī, hiki iā lākou ke noʻonoʻo ʻole, ʻaʻole hiki iā lākou ke ʻae i nā pae maʻamau o ka huhū, ua maʻalahi lākou a hoʻohaʻahaʻa i kā lākou mau hemahema. ponoʻī a me nā kālena. Inā ʻaʻole lawa ka hoʻoikaika ʻana o nā kumu i helu ʻia ma luna nei e kōkua i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i ka manaʻo ponoʻī i kāu mau keiki a laila he aha ka hopena inā ʻaʻole pono ʻoe.

ʻAʻole maʻalahi ka hānai ʻana i nā keiki i manaʻo nui iā lākou iho, ʻoiai inā ʻo ʻoe kekahi o nā pākeke he nui ʻole i manaʻo nui iā lākou iho. E haʻi aku au i kēia iā ʻoe, he makua maikaʻi ʻoe, a he kanaka maikaʻi ʻoe. ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ua mākaukau ʻoe i kēia ʻatikala e kōkua i kāu mau keiki e hōʻoiaʻiʻo ana he kanaka maikaʻi ʻoe a he makua maikaʻi. No laila pehea ʻoe e hoʻokomo ai i ka manaʻo ponoʻī i kāu mau keiki? He nīnau nui kēlā a e haʻi aku wau iā ʻoe me kekahi mau ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo.

Pōʻakahi: E noʻonoʻo ma mua o kou ʻōlelo ʻana

Inā hoʻokahi mea ma kēia ao e hiki ke hōʻeha loa i ke keiki a i ʻole ke kiʻekiʻe o ke keiki i kahi kiʻekiʻe, ʻo ia ka ʻōlelo a ko lākou mau mākua. ʻAʻohe oʻu manaʻo i ka makahiki o kāu keiki, hiki i kāu ʻōlelo ke manaʻo i ka honua iā lākou. No laila e hoʻomaikaʻi iā lākou no ka hana maikaʻi. ʻOi aku ka mea nui inā ʻaʻole lākou e hoʻokō i nā mea i manaʻo ʻia, ma mua o ka ʻōlelo ʻana iā lākou e hoʻoikaika ikaika i hiki iā lākou ke hana, e uku i ka hana a lākou i hana ai. Ua lohe au i ka ʻōlelo ʻana o nā mākua he nui, "E ho'āʻo hou aʻe ʻoe a hiki ʻoe," a nānā au i ka helehelena o ke keiki. Ua manaʻo ʻino lākou, a ʻoiai ʻoe e manaʻo nei e paipai ana ʻoe iā lākou, ke ʻōlelo ʻoe iā lākou e hoʻoikaika ikaika i ka manawa aʻe, ma ko lākou poʻo ke hoʻopaʻa nei ʻoe i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole lākou "pono".

Pōʻalua: E lilo i kumu hoʻohālike maikaʻi

Hiki iā ʻoe ke hahai i kēia ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo inā he kiʻekiʻe kiʻekiʻe kou manaʻo ponoʻī a ʻaʻole paha. Mai hoʻohaʻahaʻa iā ʻoe iho a ʻaʻole hoʻopono ʻole e pili ana i kou hiki a me kou mau talena. Aʻo kā mākou mau keiki ma ka laʻana, ko mākou hiʻohiʻona. E hoʻoikaika i ka nānā ʻana i nā mea maikaʻi e pili ana iā ʻoe. E paipai kēia i kāu mau keiki e hana like.

Pōʻakolu: Hoʻolohe, hopu a hoʻohuli hou

Pono nā mākua e hoʻolohe pono i kā lākou mau keiki. Ke ʻōlelo ikaika nei au no ka mea ʻike wau hoʻolohe mākou a pau i kā mākou mau keiki me nā pepeiao makua, no laila lohe mākou i kā lākou ʻōlelo akā ʻaʻole mākou e hoʻolohe mau i kā lākou ʻōlelo. ʻIke wau i ka wā e hele ai kaʻu keiki e pili ana iā Pokémon, aia wau i nā pepeiao o koʻu makuahine, no ka mea hiki iā ia ke kamaʻilio e pili ana iā ia no ka wā pau ʻole a me kaʻu hoʻāʻo ʻana, ʻaʻole maopopo iaʻu ʻo Pokémon. Akā, makemake ʻoe e hoʻolohe i kā lākou e ʻōlelo nei, ʻoiai ke kamaʻilio nei lākou e pili ana iā lākou iho a i kā lākou mau hoaaloha, no ka mea makemake ʻoe e hopu iā lākou i ka wā e kamaʻilio maikaʻi ʻole ai lākou e pili ana iā lākou iho a hoʻohuli iā lākou. A hoʻihoʻi hou iā lākou i ka loiloi pololei ʻana iā lākou iho. E kuhikuhi i nā ʻano maikaʻi i loaʻa iā lākou. ʻAʻole maikaʻi mākou a pau, a i ʻole nā ​​mana ʻoki kuki o kekahi a he mea maikaʻi ia.

Poaha: Kupono a aloha

E pūliki i kāu mau keiki; e haʻi aku iā lākou ua haʻaheo ʻoe iā lākou. ʻAʻohe oʻu manaʻo i ka nui o ko lākou mau makahiki pono lākou a i ka wā e loaʻa ai; e hoʻomaikaʻi i ko lākou manaʻo. Hoʻokomo wau i nā "moʻolelo aloha" liʻiliʻi i kā lākou ʻaina awakea. 'Ōlelo lākou i nā mea maʻalahi e like me, "Aloha au iāʻoe," aiʻole "Manaʻo wau he maikaʻiʻoe," hiki paha iāʻoe keʻakaʻaka a manaʻo paha kāu mau keiki he mea lapuwale. Aia paha i mua o ko lākou mau hoaaloha, akā i ka wā e noho hoʻokahi ai lākou e hana ai kēlā memo i ko lākou lā.

Mai hoʻonui i ka mahalo a me ke aloha. No ka mea, ke hana ʻoe i kekahi mea, nalowale ka manaʻo. No ka laʻana, hoʻonāukiuki i kā mākou mau keiki ʻaʻole wau me kaʻu kāne e ʻōlelo "Aloha au iā ʻoe," i kēlā me kēia manawa a mākou e haʻalele ai i ke kelepona kekahi i kekahi a inā mākou e hele i nā wahi kaʻawale a honi aloha. Ua wehewehe mākou iā lākou, ke ʻōlelo ʻoe "Aloha au iā ʻoe," i nā manawa āpau e lilo ia i mea like me ka ʻōlelo ʻana "Aloha," a i ʻole "Aloha ʻoe." Ua ʻike mākou he aloha nui mākou i kekahi i kekahi, a hōʻike mākou i kēlā me kēia lā i ʻole e ʻōlelo pinepine ʻia.

Pōʻalima: Manaʻo ʻōlelo pololei a maikaʻi.

E ho'āʻo e hōʻole i ka ʻōlelo ʻana i kāu mau keiki e like me, "E hoʻoikaika ʻoe iā ʻoe iho i loko o ka huhū ma mua o ka mea ʻole," e manaʻo ai kāu keiki me he mea lā ʻaʻohe ona mana i kona mau manaʻo a me ke ʻano o ka haʻi ʻana iā lākou. E hoʻomaopopo i ko lākou manaʻo a hōʻike iā lākou ua haʻaheo ʻoe iā lākou no ka hōʻike ʻana iā lākou iho me ke kūpono.

Pōʻaono: E hoʻoulu i kahi Kaiapuni home palekana a aloha

He haʻahaʻa ko nā keiki ʻaʻohe wahi palekana ma ka home. He haʻahaʻa ka manaʻo haʻahaʻa o nā keiki i loaʻa nā mākua i ka hakakā pinepine ʻana, a i ʻole inā hoʻomāinoino ʻia ke keiki a ʻaʻole palekana i ka home. I kekahi manawa, ʻo ke ala maikaʻi loa e hānai ai i ka manaʻo ponoʻī i kā mākou mau keiki, ʻo ia ke hoʻōki a loiloi i kā mākou mau hana ponoʻī a me ke kaiapuni a mākou e hana ai no lākou. ʻO kahi home palekana a aloha e kōkua i nā mea a pau e ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi.

ʻO ka Lāpule: ʻO ka hui ʻana ma luna o ka hoʻokūkū

Manaʻo mākou a pau he ala maikaʻi loa nā haʻuki e hoʻonui ai i ka manaʻo a me ka hilinaʻi o kā mākou mau keiki. ʻAe, ʻae inā makemake kāu keiki i ka haʻuki. Akā, e hoʻomanaʻo i hiki i ka hoʻokūkū ke loaʻa ka hopena hope, me ka manaʻo ʻole o kāu keiki. Hiki i nā hana e paipai i ka launa pū ʻana ke hoʻoikaika i ka manaʻo ponoʻī i nā keiki a pau. ʻO nā hiʻohiʻona maikaʻi o kēia mau ʻano papahana he mau papahana aʻo.

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  • E hoʻohui hou au i kahi mea hou ma ʻaneʻi: ʻo ka manaʻo hilinaʻi maoli mai nā keiki e manaʻo nui ana i kā lākou hāʻawi ʻana, a laila hoʻokomo lākou i ko lākou manaʻo he hiki. No laila, e ʻimi i nā manawa e (kūpono) e hoʻokomo i kāu mau keiki i nā kūkākūkā ʻohana– e noi i ko lākou mau manaʻo (ʻaʻole kēia manaʻo ʻo lākou ke alakaʻi a kāhea i nā kiʻi paʻi– ʻo ia hoʻi ke paipai nei ʻoe iā lākou e ʻike iā lākou iho i komo i kā lākou kaiaulu- home) a hoʻokomo i kāu mau keiki i ka hāʻawi ʻana i ka maikaʻi o ka ʻohana a i ʻole ka honua. E ʻimi i nā hana i kūpono i ka hoʻomohala ʻana– ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi– e ʻike inā hiki i kāu keiki ke koho i ke ala e makemake ai ʻo ia e kōkua– hoʻonohonoho i ka papaʻaina, hoʻomaʻemaʻe i nā mea pāʻani, a pēlā aku. Ke hoʻohana nā keiki, ʻike lākou iā lākou iho he pono.

    Tamar Chansky
    Mea kākau, Hoʻokuʻu ʻana i kāu keiki mai ka noʻonoʻo ʻino: nā hoʻolālā ikaika a hoʻomaʻamaʻa no ke kūkulu ʻana i ke ola o ke kūpaʻa, ka maʻalahi a me ka hauʻoli.
    http://www.freeingyourchild.com

  • ʻO ka pou maikaʻi

    Ma ke ʻano he makua kāne ʻelua, ʻike wau he maʻalahi kēia e ʻōlelo a maʻalahi hoʻi e poina i ka wā e pilikia ai ke ola. He mea kēia e pono ai nā mākua a pau i mea hoʻomanaʻo mau.

    Mahalo

Koho i kahi Pūʻōlelo

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