na Jennifer Shakeel
ʻAʻole nawaliwali kāna kaikamahine, a ʻaʻole hoʻi i hoʻokuke ʻia… he kanaka maikaʻi wale nō ia. Ua hana maikaʻi kona mau mākua i ka hānai ʻana iā ia a me ke aʻo ʻana iā ia e ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ke ala kiʻekiʻe. No ka hana ʻino ʻana o kekahi iā ʻoe, ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo pono ʻoe e hana ʻino iā lākou. Ua ʻae loa au i kēia, ua hana like mākou me kā mākou mau keiki. ʻOiai ua hoʻāʻo mākou e hoʻokomo iā lākou ʻo ka hele ʻana i ke ala kiʻekiʻe ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo e lilo ʻoe i pale puka no kekahi. I kēia lā ke hāʻawi aku nei au i nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo makua e pili ana i ke kōkua ʻana i kāu keiki e kū pono iā lākou iho.
Table of Contents
Manaʻo Mākua ʻEkahi: E hoʻihoʻi i kahi hōʻino me ka hoʻomaikaʻi
ʻOiaʻiʻo e pili ana kēia i ke kūlana. Ma ka hihia o ke kaikamahine a kaʻu hoaaloha, he kaikamahine ʻuʻuku wale nō ia a he 11 mau makahiki. He mea nui ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana e loaʻa i ka mea hoʻoweliweli i kēia hihia ka ʻoluʻolu ma luna o ka hoʻoweliweli ʻana i ka "pōʻino". Makemake lākou e ʻike i ka mea a lākou e hoʻomāinoino nei, no lākou he mea ia e hoʻonoho ai i kēlā kanaka ma ko lākou wahi ma lalo o ka mea hoʻoweliweli. ʻO ia kaʻu i ʻōlelo aku ai e nānā ʻo ia i kēia kaikamahine liʻiliʻi ʻē aʻe ke ʻano ʻino a ʻōlelo ʻo ia, "ʻO ʻoe ka xxxx maikaʻi loa," me ka ʻakaʻaka a huli a hele. Mai hāʻawi i ka mea hoʻomāinoino i ka ʻoluʻolu o ka hana ʻana iā ʻoe e like me ka palaka, e hoʻomaopopo iā lākou ʻaʻole pilikia kāu mea e ʻōlelo nei.
Manaʻo Mākua ʻElua: Kāhea i ka Bully Out
I kekahi manawa ʻo ka hele ʻana i ke ala kiʻekiʻe ʻaʻole ia e pili ana i ka hāʻule ʻole ʻana i ka hana ʻino, e pili ana ia i ke kāhea ʻana i ka mea hoʻoweliweli no kā lākou hana. No ke kaikamahine a ko mākou hoaaloha, ua ʻōlelo au e nānā ʻo ia i kāna "hoa kime" a ʻōlelo aku, "Ua manaʻo wau he hui mākou. Kākoʻo nā hoa hui kekahi i kekahi. ʻAʻole pono mākou e makemake kekahi i kekahi, akā pono mākou e kākoʻo kekahi i kekahi. I nā manawa he nui, ʻoi aku hoʻi me nā kamaliʻi liʻiliʻi, ʻo ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole i kāhea ʻia ka mea hoʻoweliweli ma luna o ke kapena no kā lākou ʻano e paipai i ka ʻano. No laila, ke kū kekahi kanaka iā lākou a kuhikuhi i ka hewa a lākou e hana nei, e pau ka hana hoʻoweliweli.
Manaʻo Mākua ʻEkolu: E ʻae i kāu mau keiki e hōʻike i ko lākou mau manaʻo ma ka home
Ke ʻike ke keiki hiki iā ia ke hōʻike iā ia iho i ka ʻoluʻolu a me ka palekana o ko lākou home ponoʻī me ka ʻole o ka hopena, ʻoi aku ko lākou makemake e hōʻike iā lākou iho ma waho o ka home. Akā, pono lākou e aʻo mua pehea. Pono ka home i wahi palekana no ke kūʻokoʻa o ka ʻōlelo. Hāʻawi kēia iā ʻoe i ka manawa e aʻo ai iā lākou i ke ala kūpono e ʻōlelo ai i ko lākou manaʻo.
Manaʻo Mākua ʻEhā: E ʻike iā lākou ʻAʻole lākou e ʻae i ka hana ʻia ʻana i mea hōʻoluʻolu
No nā keiki ma nā papa kindergarten a hiki i ka papa ʻekolu e aʻo ana iā lākou e ʻōlelo, “ʻAʻole makemake au i kāu hana, e ʻoluʻolu, mai hana hou." Hiki ke loaʻa ka pōmaikaʻi no ka mea ʻo ia ke aʻo ʻana o nā keiki i nā mākau pilikanaka a hana i ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa ʻana i kā lākou ʻike. ʻO ka hana pinepine ʻana i nā pāʻani ma ka home hiki ke kōkua i ke aʻo ʻana i kāu keiki i ka mea ʻoluʻolu ʻole iā lākou, akā pehea e hoʻoponopono ai i ka wā e hiki mai ana. I loko o ko mākou home, ua mālama nui wau i kaʻu mau keiki. A ʻo koʻu makaʻu nui, ʻo ka hoʻāʻo ʻana o kekahi e hana i kekahi mea iā lākou… a i ʻole e koi aku iā lākou e hana i kekahi mea ma ka haʻi ʻana iā lākou he maikaʻi, ʻo ia ke aloha, a inā ʻaʻole lākou e hana, e ʻeha ko lākou ʻohana. Nui mākou i ka hoʻopā maikaʻi, nā pilikia hoʻopā maikaʻi pū kekahi. Ua ʻike kā mākou mau keiki ʻaʻohe mea e hōʻeha iā mākou, me ka nānā ʻole i ka mea i haʻi ʻia iā lākou… hiki iā lākou ke haʻi mai iā mākou i kekahi mea…
Pono nā keiki e ʻike i kēlā. Pono lākou e hoʻolohe i kāu ʻōlelo ʻana, a pinepine. Pono lākou e ʻike ua ʻōlelo ʻoe he mea maikaʻi iā lākou ke ʻōlelo i ko lākou manaʻo a pono lākou e haʻi iā ʻoe inā loaʻa kekahi mea. Mai manaʻo e ʻike lākou inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e haʻi iā lākou.
Manaʻo Mākua ʻElima: E komo i loko
Aia kekahi mau manawa e hiki ai ka hoʻoweliweli i kahi e pono ai nā mākua e komo. Ma ka hihia o ko mākou hoaaloha ʻohana ua hele ka makuahine i ke poʻo o ka hui alakaʻi hauʻoli. Ua haʻi ʻia ʻo ia inā ʻike ke kaʻi i kēlā ʻano hana, pono ke kaʻi e hoʻoponopono a hāʻawi i kahi demerit, a i ʻole e hoʻopaʻa i ka lede ʻōpio. ʻO ke kaʻi ka makuahine o kēia kaikamahine liʻiliʻi e hana nei i ka hoʻoweliweli. No laila he aha ka hana a ka makua? Ke manaʻoʻiʻo nei au aia kekahi mau manawa e pono ai ʻoe i ka makua honua, a pono ʻoe e hana i mea e lohe a ʻike ai ka makua o kekahi keiki. ʻAʻole kēia manaʻo e ʻuā ʻoe i ke keiki, a i ʻole e hoe iā ia a i ʻole kekahi mea like. ʻO ia hoʻi, ma ke ʻano he makua ke komo ʻoe i ka wā e ʻike ai ʻoe i kēia ʻano a ʻōlelo ʻoe, "ʻAʻole kēia ke ʻano o kā mākou hana ʻana kekahi i kekahi a maopopo iaʻu ua aʻo maikaʻi ʻia ʻoe e kou makuahine/makua/mākua ma mua o kēlā." He aha ka ʻōlelo a ka makua ʻē aʻe?
ʻAʻole i hana ko mākou hoaaloha i kēia no ka mea, lawe ke kaʻi i ke kaikamahine a ko mākou hoaaloha.
Manaʻo makua ʻeono: E hoʻokomo i kāu keiki i nā haʻuki a i ʻole nā hui
ʻOiaʻiʻo ma ke kūlana i hoʻoulu ai i kēia ʻatikala, nā hana hui ke kumu o ka pilikia. Akā ʻaʻole pēlā ka hihia maʻamau. ʻO ka hoʻokomo ʻana iā lākou i nā hana e aʻo iā lākou i ka pale ʻana iā lākou iho e like me ka martial arts, kickboxing, ka haʻi ʻōlelo a me ka hoʻopaʻapaʻa, junior Optimists a me nā mea like e hoʻopuni iā lākou me nā keiki ʻē aʻe e kūkulu ana i ko lākou ʻano a e hana ana e aʻo pehea e "pale" iā lākou iho.
Manaʻo Mākua ʻEhiku: E ʻae iā lākou e pale iā lākou iho
ʻAe, ʻaʻole wau he kākoʻo no ka hana ʻino, e ʻoluʻolu e hoʻomaopopo i kēlā. Akā aia kekahi mau manawa (me nā keiki ʻōpio) ʻo ka mea e pono ai ka mea hoʻoweliweli e hoʻihoʻi i ka mea a lākou e ʻai nei. E hana kēia i nā mea ʻelua, e ʻike i ka mea hoʻoweliweli ʻaʻole hiki iā lākou ke hoʻokuke hou i kāu keiki no ka mea ʻaʻole makaʻu kāu keiki a e ʻike i kāu keiki i kekahi manawa pono ʻoe e pāʻani ma kahi pā pāʻani pae e like nā mea āpau. . Ua aʻo ʻia kā mākou mau keiki ʻaʻole maikaʻi ke hoʻomaka i kahi hakakā, ʻaʻole lākou e hoʻolei i ka kuʻi mua… akā ke pale nei lākou iā lākou iho.
ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hele i nā manawa a pau. Aia kekahi mau manawa pono ʻoe e omo a lawe a kū i luna a pale iā ʻoe iho. Aia kekahi poʻe ʻaʻole aʻo i kēia a hiki i ko lākou wā makua, aia kekahi poʻe ʻaʻole aʻo i nā mea āpau. E aʻo aku i kāu keiki i kēia manawa hiki iā ia ke pale aku iā lākou iho ke koi ʻia kahi kūlana. ʻO ka hele ʻana i ke ala kiʻekiʻe ʻaʻole ia he ʻūhā.
Kawaihae
He mea kākau ʻo Jennifer Shakeel a he kahu hānai mua. Ma ke ʻano he makuahine o nā keiki maikaʻi ʻole ʻelua, eia wau e haʻi aku iā ʻoe i nā mea aʻu i aʻo ai e pili ana i ka makua. Ua loaʻa iā ADD kekahi o kaʻu mau keiki, ʻo kā mākou huakaʻi aʻo e hoʻokō i nā ʻōlelo me ka maʻi maʻi a me ka noʻonoʻo ʻana i ka mea maikaʻi loa no mākou he paʻakikī a hauʻoli. Ua ʻike ʻia kā mākou keiki ma kahi o ʻelua a me ka hapa makahiki i hala, a ua loaʻa iā mākou nā piʻi a me nā haʻahaʻa, nā hauʻoli a me nā kaumaha. Inā hiki iaʻu ke hāʻawi aku iā ʻoe i hoʻokahi lā o ka manaʻolana a i ʻole kekahi manaʻo e kōkua iā ʻoe a me kou ʻohana a laila ʻike wau ua hoʻokō ʻia kaʻu kumu.
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