Parenting ʻO nā mea'ōpio

Ka Manaʻo Mākua a me kāu ʻOpio

Ua nele anei kāu ʻōpio i ka hilinaʻi iā ia iho a me ka manaʻo ponoʻī? Ke manaʻo nei kāu ʻōpio ua lawa lākou? ʻO kekahi o nā pilikia nui a lākou e kamaʻilio nei, ʻaʻole lawa ka maikaʻi. ʻAʻole maikaʻi loa ka hana a lākou.

na Stephanie Partridge

hoʻohaʻahaʻa haʻahaʻa iho"Ke manaʻo nei kāu ʻōpio ua lawa lākou?"

Ua kamaʻilio wau me kekahi mau ʻōpio, a i ʻole, ua kamaʻilio wau lohe i kekahi mau ʻōpio. Makemake au e ʻike i ka mea i loko o ko lākou mau manaʻo, nā mea e hoʻopilikia nei iā lākou, nā mea e keʻakeʻa nei i ko lākou pilina me ko lākou mau mākua.

Ua ho'āʻo wau e nīnau i kaʻu mau keiki ponoʻī, akā ʻaʻole lākou i kōkua. ʻŌlelo lāua ʻelua, “Mama, ʻaʻole hiki iaʻu ke hoʻopiʻi. E hoʻolohe mai ʻoe iā mākou; mahalo ʻoe iā mākou, ke haʻi mākou iā ʻoe i kekahi mea e lohe maoli ʻoe iā mākou. Ke hilinaʻi nei ʻoe iā mākou, ke hōʻike mai nei ʻoe iā mākou i kou aloha iā mākou, ʻo ʻoe ko mākou hoaaloha maikaʻi loa. ʻAʻohe o mākou hoʻopiʻi iki!”

ʻAe, he kōkua nui kēlā.

No laila, hoʻomaka wau e kamaʻilio me nā hoaaloha o kaʻu mau keiki. Ua ʻōlelo ka nui o lākou makemake lākou e noho ma koʻu hale, manaʻo e hiki iaʻu ke hānai iā lākou. Ua ʻakaʻaka wau i kēlā manawa, akā ʻaʻole wau ʻakaʻaka i kēia manawa. ʻO ka ʻeha maka aʻu i ʻike ai i ka ninini ʻana mai o kēia mau ʻōpio i ko lākou puʻuwai iaʻu, ʻaʻole ia he mea ʻakaʻaka. Hele mai kēia mau keiki mai nā ʻano like ʻole o ke ola, nā hale hoʻokele waiwai āpau. ʻO nā keikikāne a me nā kaikamāhine, loaʻa i kēia mau keiki nā hoʻopiʻi āpau - hiki ke pilikia.

ʻO kekahi o nā pilikia nui a lākou e kamaʻilio nei, ʻaʻole lawa ka maikaʻi. ʻAʻole maikaʻi loa ka hana a lākou.

ʻO kekahi kaikamahine 16 makahiki aʻu i ʻike pono ai i haʻi mai iaʻu pehea ʻo ia e hoʻopau ai i ka hapalua o ka lā e hoʻomaʻemaʻe hale i ka wā e hana ana kona makuahine. Holoi ʻo ia i nā kīʻaha, kahili, mop, hoʻomaʻemaʻe i nā helu helu, a holoi i nā mea a pau a alohilohi (ʻike wau, ua ʻike wau i kāna hana), a hoʻi mai kona makuahine i ka home a ʻōlelo mai, "ʻAuhea ka ʻaina ahiahi?"

ʻAʻole mālama ʻia ka hana nui a kēia kaikamahine.

Nui nā mākua e poina i kā lākou poʻe keiki e noʻonoʻo ana, manaʻo hoʻokahi. Pane lākou i ka mahalo a me ka maikaʻi. Pane lākou i ka ʻike ʻia ʻana o kā lākou hana, ke ʻike ʻia kā lākou hana paʻakikī.

ʻAe, ʻaʻole hana kāu mau keiki i kāna mea i manaʻo ai e hana (ʻAʻohe keiki e hana). Akā naʻe, ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo e haʻalele ʻoe i nā mea maikaʻi a lākou i hana ai, a i ʻole nā ​​mea a lākou i hana pono ai. ʻOiaʻiʻo, inā ʻoe e nānā wale i ka mea a lākou mea ole hana ana i na mea a lakou ua e liʻiliʻi a lōʻihi ka hana ma waena. E kaha i ka'u mau olelo.

He maikaʻi ka "Sandwich Effect" i kēia mau kūlana.

ʻO ka "Sandwich Effect"

He manaʻo maʻalahi, ʻoiaʻiʻo. Inā pono ʻoe e hoʻopuka i ka hoʻohewa ʻana, e ʻai i waena o nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi ʻelua. No ka laʻana, "Jimmy, ua hana nui ʻoe i ka lawe ʻana i kāu mau māka. Haʻaheo loa au iā ʻoe. Pono wau iā ʻoe e noʻonoʻo nui i kāu mau hana a lawe i ke kuleana i nā mea āu e hana ai e kōkua ai i ka ʻohana. Akā, he akamai loa ʻoe a haʻaheo loa au iā ʻoe no laila ʻike wau ʻaʻole pilikia kēia. Hiki iaʻu ke kōkua e hoʻomanaʻo iā ʻoe no kekahi manawa a lilo ia i mea maʻamau. E kōkua anei kēlā iā ʻoe?”

I kēia manawa, ma kahi o ka puhi ʻana a hoʻomāinoino paha i ke keiki, ua hoʻomanaʻo wale ʻoe iā ia e ʻike ʻoe i kāna mau hana. Ua hoʻomanaʻo pū ʻoe iā ia he mau mea ʻē aʻe e pono ai ʻo ia e hoʻomaikaʻi, akā ua hōʻike ʻoe iā ia he hilinaʻi ʻoe iā ia a hāʻawi pū ʻoe e kōkua iā ia e hoʻomaka.

Hōʻalo i nā mea laulā a me ke kuhikuhi manamana lima

oe aole loa kōkua mai iaʻu a puni ka hale! ʻO ʻoe PALAPALA kamaʻilio hope! ʻO kēia kaʻu pipi pipi nui a hiki ke hōʻino i kahi keiki. E pale i nā mea maʻamau i nā koina a pau.  ʻAʻohe mea ʻino. Hiki paha iā ʻoukou nā keiki ke huikau. ʻOiaʻiʻo, e hana ʻino lākou, ʻo kā lākou hana ia e like me nā kamaliʻi! Akā, ʻaʻole lākou e hoʻopau i nā manawa a pau. He hana ʻino nō hoʻi ke kau ʻana iā lākou ma ka pale ma ke kuhikuhi ʻana i nā manamana lima. Mai kuhikuhi i ka manamana lima iā lākou e hōʻike iā lākou i ka hewa o kā lākou hana ʻana. E noʻonoʻo e pili ana i ka manawa e hoʻomau ai ʻoe i kahi ʻōlelo iā lākou me ka huaʻōlelo "ʻO ʻoe," ʻoiai ke haʻi nei ʻoe iā lākou i kā lākou hana hewa.

Inā makemake ʻoe e lawe lākou i ka ʻōpala, e hoʻāʻo e ʻōlelo, “Makemake au iā ʻoe e lawe i ka ʻōpala, e ʻoluʻolu. E hele mai, e kōkua au iā ʻoe ma ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana i ka ʻōpala o ka lumi ʻauʻau i ka wā e nakinaki ai ʻoe i ka ʻōpala kīhini."

Inā ʻaʻole lākou e hana i ka mea i manaʻo ʻia, e hoʻāʻo e ʻōlelo, “Makemake au iā ʻoe e kōkua mai iaʻu ma ʻaneʻi. Hana wau i kaʻu mea hiki, akā, holoi ʻoe i nā kīʻaha / kuke maikaʻi loa a kōkua maoli ia iaʻu.

Hōʻalo i ka hōʻino ʻana

ʻO ka mea ʻino wale nō e loaʻa iā ʻoe he migraine a me kahi keiki huhū (a ʻaʻole paha ka pahuhopu āu i manaʻo ai). E nīnau ʻekolu manawa a paʻi iā lākou i kahi e ʻeha ai. E lawe i ke kelepona paʻa, kamepiula, kaʻa, nā mea a pau a mai hoʻihoʻi a hana lākou i kāu mea i noi ai. Akā ʻo ka mea āu e hana ai, mai NAG!

Hoʻokū i ka Pono

Inā hana lākou i kahi mea kūpono, e hōʻike iā lākou. Ua Laki.

Hāʻawi i kahi koho

ʻAʻohe mea makemake e haʻi ʻia i ka mea e hana ai. I kēia manawa, ma mua o kou puhi ʻana a ʻōlelo, “He poʻe keiki lākou! ʻO mākou i manaʻoʻia e haʻi iā lākou i ka mea e hana ai!" e hoʻolohe mai iaʻu. ʻAʻole wau e ʻōlelo ana e hāʻawi ʻoe iā lākou i kahi koho inā hana lākou i kāu mea e ʻōlelo ai iā lākou. ʻAʻole wau e ʻōlelo ana pēlā. ʻO kaʻu e ʻōlelo nei, pono ʻoe e hāʻawi iā lākou i nā koho i nā manawa a me nā wahi āu e hiki ai. E hāʻawi wau i kumu hoʻohālike.

ʻO kaʻu muli loa ke mālama i ka ʻōpala. Lawe ʻo ia i waho i ka wā e piha ai. I kekahi mau lā, poina naʻe ʻo ia. Ala au i ke kakahiaka i kahi pahu ʻōpala piha. Hele au i kona lumi a penei ke kamaʻilio ʻana:

Me: Ben, pono kāua e hana e pili ana i ka ʻōpala, hele wale wau i loko o ka lumi kuke a kamaʻilio pū me ia
iaʻu. Ua ʻike ʻo ia i koʻu inoa - ua makaʻu iki au.

Ben: (ʻakaʻaka) E kala mai, e Māmā. Ua poina au.

Me: ʻAe, pono mākou e hana i kekahi mea. Makemake ʻoe e lawe i waho ma hope o ka ʻaina kakahiaka a i ʻole ʻoe
haʻalele i ke kula?

He maʻalahi kēlā. Ua hāʻawi aku au iā ia i kahi koho pehea e hoʻokō ai i kāna mau hana. ʻAʻole wau i hāʻawi iā ia i kahi koho inā e hana ʻo ia a ʻaʻole paha. Akā, e haʻi aku wau iā ʻoe, ʻo kēia ʻenehana ma kahi o 98% maikaʻi a ʻaʻole pono wau e hoʻopaʻi, hoʻopiʻi a hoʻopaʻapaʻa paha. Ke waiho nei au iā ia e hana i ka koho aʻu i hāʻawi ai iā ia a hoʻokō ʻia.

Hoʻouna kēia iā ia i ka ʻōlelo a) aia kekahi mana i kona ola, b) hilinaʻi wau iā ia a manaʻoʻiʻo nui iā ia e ʻae iā ia e hana i kāna mau hoʻoholo ponoʻī, a c) mahalo nui wau iā ia e mālama iā ia e like me kanaka ma kahi o kekahi hiki iaʻu ke kauoha a puni.

ʻO ka pōmaikaʻi o kēia, ʻo ia kaʻu ʻike ʻana i kaʻu mau keiki e hoʻoholo maikaʻi loa a ʻaʻole lākou e pilikia. He alakaʻi lākou a hele i ka paʻi o kā lākou pahu ponoʻī no ka mea ua hilinaʻi lākou i ko lākou ʻano a me ka mea hiki iā lākou ke hana.

E hilinaʻi iaʻu, ʻo ka manaʻoʻiʻo i kāu mau keiki a me ka hōʻike ʻana iā lākou (ʻaʻole ma ka haʻi wale ʻana, akā ma ka hōʻike ʻana) ʻo ia kekahi o nā mea maikaʻi loa e hiki ai iā ʻoe ke hana no ko lākou manaʻo ponoʻī a hilinaʻi. E hōʻike iā lākou ua lawa lākou a mahalo ʻia kā lākou hana.

Kawaihae
ʻO Stephanie Partridge he mea kākau kūʻokoʻa a me ka mea paʻi kiʻi a me ka mea loiloi FOIA no kahi keʻena federal ma Wakinekona, DC He makuahine hoʻokahi ʻo ia iā Jeffery, 19; ʻO Mika Elizabeth, 17 a me Beniamina, 15. ʻO ia hoʻi ka mea kākau o ka ebook, "He ʻōlelo Dirty ka ʻai."

ʻAʻole hiki ke kope a paʻi hou ʻia kekahi ʻāpana o kēia ʻatikala ma kekahi ʻano me ka ʻae ʻole o More4Kids Inc © a me nā kuleana āpau.

More4keiki

Hoʻohui Comment

Kaomi ma aneʻi e hoʻopuka i kahi manaʻo

Ke hoʻohana nei kēia pūnaewele i ka Akismet e ho'ēmi i ka spam. E aʻo pehea e hanaʻia ai kāuʻikeʻikepili.

Koho i kahi Pūʻōlelo

Māhele