ʻO nā hoaaloha maikaʻi loa: hana i kahi pilina paʻa loa ma waena o kāu mau keiki
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me nā keiki makemake e hoʻolimalima manawa ʻO kēlā me kēia makua ka moeʻuhane o kēlā me kēia makua. He mea paʻakikī ke kūkulu ʻana i nā pilina pili kaikuaʻana no nā mākua. ʻO ia kekahi o kaʻu mau pahuhopu nui mai ka manawa i hiki mai ai kaʻu keiki ʻelua i ʻelua makahiki ma hope o kaʻu hānau mua ʻana. Ua pili au i koʻu mau kaikunāne ʻewalu i koʻu wā e ulu ana, a i kēia lā, manaʻo wau i ka nui o lākou he mau hoaaloha pili loa au.
I kēia manawa, me kaʻu mau ʻōpio a hiki i kahi e lilo koke ai lākou i mau mākua, manaʻo wau ua kūleʻa wau i kaʻu misionari i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i kahi pilina paʻa ma waena o kaʻu mau keiki. Hoʻopaʻa pinepine kaʻu mau keiki i kekahi i kekahi, ʻoiai ke kaʻawale lākou no ʻelua mau hola, a hui pū lākou i ka hui like o nā hoaaloha. Hoʻolālā koʻu muli loa e hele i ke kulanui like me kona kaikunāne nui, a ʻaʻole hiki iaʻu ke hauʻoli i ko lāua pilina paʻa.
Eia nā mea a pau aʻu i hana ai no ka hoʻoulu ʻana i ko lāua aloha i kekahi i kekahi i nā makahiki a hoʻoikaika pū i ka pilina maoli.
Hāʻawi iā lākou i ka hui pū
Pono ka pilina maikaʻi i nā aʻa nui, a ua hoʻokumu ʻia ia mau mea e ka manawa i hui pū ʻia. ʻOiai ua paipai mau wau i kaʻu mau keiki e loaʻa i nā hoaaloha, ua hōʻoia wau e hoʻokomo i ka manawa nui no kaʻu mau keiki e noho pū ai.
He mea koʻikoʻi kēia manawa no ka mea hiki iā lākou ke hana i loko o nā ʻakaʻaka a hana i kēlā mau hoʻomanaʻo koʻikoʻi e hoʻohui iā lāua a mau loa. Inā paha e nānā ana i kā lākou hōʻike kīwī punahele a i ʻole ke kau ʻana i loko o kahi loko hōkele i ka wā hoʻomaha o kā mākou ʻohana makahiki, ua nui ka hui ʻana o kaʻu mau keiki.
Hāʻawi iā lākou i ka nui like o nā hana
Wehe mau koʻu puka i nā hoaaloha o kaʻu mau keiki, a ua haʻi mai kekahi helu kāhāhā o lākou iaʻu ʻaʻole makemake lākou i ko lākou mau kaikaina ma muli o ke kūlana hana ma ka home. Ke hoʻopiʻi nei kekahi o lākou e koi ʻia lākou e hana ʻoi aku ka hana ma mua o ko lākou mau kaikunāne, a ua huhū lākou no ia mea. He mea paʻakikī i kāu mau keiki ke makemake e pili aku inā manaʻo lākou ua ʻokoʻa ka mālama ʻia ʻana o kekahi ma mua o kekahi. Ma ke ʻano he makua, ʻo ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa ʻana i nā hana hale e hāpai i kahi pilina maikaʻi ma waena o kāu mau keiki.
I koʻu wā kamaliʻi, ua hāʻawi ʻia koʻu mau kaikunāne i nā hana i kapa ʻia ʻo "kāne", e like me ka lawe ʻana i ka ʻōpala a i ʻole ka ʻoki ʻana i ka pā. ʻO wau a me koʻu mau kaikuahine i kōkua maʻamau i nā hana i manaʻo ʻia he wahine, e like me ka kuke ʻana a me ka holoi ʻana. A manaʻo he aha? Huhū mau au i nā keikikāne no ka hele ʻana i ka mow. ʻO ka mea pōmaikaʻi, ua loli nā manawa, a ke hele nei nā kuleana kāne. Lawe kaʻu mau keiki ʻelua i ka ʻōpala, kuke, a hoʻomaʻemaʻe, me ka nānā ʻole i ke kāne.
He mau hana ka'u mau keiki ʻoi aku ko lākou makemake ma mua o nā mea ʻē aʻe. ʻAʻole manaʻo kaʻu keiki e lawe i ka holoi lole ma lalo, ʻoiai ʻo kaʻu kaikamahine e makemake e wehe i ka mea holoi ipu. Ua ʻae wau iā lākou e hoʻoholo i ka mea e hana nei, ʻoiai lākou e kau ana i ka manawa like.
E hana pū iā lākou i nā hana e kūkulu ai i nā pilina pili hoahānau
Me kaʻu mau keiki he ʻelua makahiki wale nō ke kaʻawale ʻana, ua ʻike wau aia kahi manawa gula no lākou e komo pū i kekahi mau hana extracurricular ma ke kula. ʻAʻole wau i ʻaʻa wale i koʻu mau manamana lima a manaʻolana lākou e kākau inoa no nā hana like - ua paipai nui au iā ia.
Ua hana ʻia kekahi o ia mea. Ua ʻike kaʻu kaikamahine i ka leʻaleʻa o kona kaikuaʻana ma ka hui Scholastic Bowl ma ke kula kiʻekiʻe a me ke kula kiʻekiʻe, no laila ua kākau inoa ʻo ia no ka hui i kona wā ʻelemakule. ʻO nā hana ʻē aʻe i makemake i ka hoʻoikaika iki ʻana, ʻoiai. ʻO ka hoʻohuli ʻana i kaʻu kaikamahine e komo i ka hui kea ʻāina a kaʻu keiki ma ke kula kiʻekiʻe he mea kūʻai paʻakikī, akā ua hoʻoholo ʻo ia e hoʻāʻo a hoʻomau i ka hui ʻoiai ua puka kona kaikunāne a e hele ana i ke kulanui.
Ua hana lāua ʻelua ma ke ʻano he umpires baseball a me softball i kēia kauwela, kahi e hana ai i kahi pilina ma waena o lākou. ʻO kēlā me kēia ʻike like e hoʻoikaika i ko lākou pilina ma o ka hoʻokumu ʻana i nā mea hoʻomanaʻo like ʻole a hāʻawi iā lākou i ka ʻike nui o kekahi i kekahi.
Inā he ʻokoʻa ka makemake o kāu mau keiki i nā extracurriculars a i ʻole he ʻokoʻa o nā makahiki i hiki ʻole iā lākou ke komo i nā hui like i ka manawa like, aia kekahi mau hana ʻē aʻe e hiki iā lākou ke hana pū. I nā lā maikaʻi i ke kauwela, haʻi wau i kaʻu mau keiki e hele pū lākou. I ka wā mua, ʻōhumu lākou i kekahi manawa no ka mea makemake lākou e hana i kahi mea ʻē aʻe. Akā ʻaneʻane lākou e hele lōʻihi ma mua o kaʻu i ʻōlelo ai iā lākou a ʻakaʻaka i nā mea a lākou i ʻike ai a i hana ai.
E hoʻoponopono iā lākou ma ke ʻano he hui
He maʻalahi ka launa pū me nā mea ʻē aʻe i ka wā e holo maikaʻi ana nā mea. Akā ke kū mai nā pilikia, pono ʻoe e ʻike hiki iā ʻoe ke hilinaʻi maoli kekahi i kekahi. ʻO ia ke kumu makemake wau e ʻike i kaʻu mau keiki i nā kūlana e pono ai lākou e hilinaʻi i kekahi i kekahi a e hana pū i ka hoʻoponopono ʻana i kahi pilikia, e like me ka hakakā ʻana i ko lākou ala ma kahi pilikia kamepiula. E heluhelu i kā mākou ʻatikala pehea e hoʻomaopopo ai i ka ʻokoʻa ma waena o ke kaikaina hoʻopaʻapaʻa a me ka hoʻoluhi hoahānau.
ʻO kekahi o kaʻu mea punahele e hana ai no ke kōkua ʻana i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i nā pilina kaikunāne ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka hāʻawi ʻana iā lākou i makana i loko o kahi pahu puzzle a nānā i ka wehe ʻana o ka hui ʻana i ko lākou hoʻoponopono ʻana. No ka laʻana, ʻelua makahiki i hala aku nei no ka Kalikimaka, ua hoʻoholo wau me kaʻu kāne e hōʻemi i kekahi mau makana a hele i Florida. Ua kūʻai mākou i pahu puʻupuʻu a kākau mākou i kahi leka e ʻōlelo ana, “E hoʻopaʻa i kāu mau ʻeke. E hele ana mākou i Florida. A laila ʻokiʻoki mākou i ka leka no laila hoʻokahi wale nō huaʻōlelo ma kēlā me kēia ʻāpana pepa, no laila pono nā keiki e wehe i nā huaʻōlelo. Hoʻokomo mākou i nā ʻāpana pepa a pau i loko o ka pahu puzzle, ʻōwili ʻia a hoʻopaʻa ʻia ma lalo o ka lāʻau.
I ka wehe ʻana o kā mākou mau keiki i ka pahu, haʻi mākou iā lākou e hana pū lākou e noʻonoʻo pehea e wehe ai i ka pahu puzzle a pono lākou e wehe i ka leka i loko. A laila noho mākou i hope a nānā i ko lākou huli ʻana a hāʻawi i nā manaʻo no ka wehe ʻana i ka pahu. Ua makemake lākou, a hauʻoli mākou i ka nānā ʻana i kā lākou hana hui a me nā mākau hoʻoholo pilikia i ka hana.
Mai Hoʻohālikelike iā lākou i kekahi i kekahi
ʻO kahi ala e wāwahi ai i nā pilina pili hoahānau, ʻo ia ka hoʻohālikelike ʻana iā lākou. ʻAʻohe mea hiki wehe i ka pilina o kāu mau keiki ʻoi aku ka wikiwiki o kekahi i kekahi ma mua o kekahi mau hoʻohālikelike manaʻo maikaʻi. Hiki iā ʻoe ke loaʻa nā kikoʻī hou aku mai kā mākou ʻatikala ma hoʻokūkū hoahānau. ʻOiai hiki i kāu mau keiki ke kaʻana like i ka inoa hope a me ke koko, pono ʻoe e hoʻomanaʻo mau ʻo lākou ko lākou poʻe. Loaʻa iā lākou nā ikaika a me nā nāwaliwali, a pono e nānā ʻia lākou e like me kou mau maka.
Pono ʻoe e nānā i kāu mea e ʻōlelo ai i kāu mau keiki a me kou leo i ke kamaʻilio pū ʻana me lākou. E hōʻalo i ka hana ʻana i nā ʻōlelo e hoʻohālikelike ai i kāu mau keiki i kekahi i kekahi ma ke ʻano maikaʻi ʻole, e like me "No ke aha e hiki ʻole ai iā ʻoe ke mālama i kou lumi e like me ka hana a kou kaikunāne?" a i ʻole “Makemake au e like ka maikaʻi o kāu mau māka e like me nā māka o kou kaikuahine."
ʻO nā ʻōlelo e like me ia e hoʻopili i kāu mau keiki i kekahi i kekahi, e kūkulu i ka huhū ma mua o ka hoʻopili ʻana iā lākou. ʻOiai inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e hoʻohālikelike pololei ma o kāu mau ʻōlelo, ke hana nei ʻoe pēlā ma kou leo leo. He mea ia e noʻonoʻo ai no ka mea hiki ke loaʻa ka hopena nui i ka nānā ʻana o kāu mau keiki iā ʻoe, iā lākou iho, a me kekahi.
FAQs
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke paipai i kaʻu mau keiki e hoʻonui i ka manawa e hui pū ai?
E paipai i nā hana e hauʻoli ai nā keiki ʻelua a hiki ke komo pū. ʻO kēia paha ke nānā ʻana i kahi hōʻike TV punahele, pāʻani pāʻani, a i ʻole hele i nā hoʻomaha ʻohana. Hoʻoikaika ka ʻike like ʻana i nā pilina pili hoahānau.
Pehea e pale aku ai i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i ka huhū ma waena o kaʻu mau keiki?
Mai hoʻohālikelike i kāu mau keiki. He ʻokoʻa kēlā me kēia keiki me ko lākou mau ikaika a me nā nāwaliwali. Hiki i nā hoʻohālikelike ke hana i ka manaʻo hoʻokūkū a me ka huhū.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke kōkua i kaʻu mau keiki e kūkulu i kahi pilina paʻa inā loaʻa iā lākou kahi ʻokoʻa makahiki?
E paipai i ke keiki nui e lawe i ka hana a'oa'o no ke kaikaina. Hiki iā lākou ke kaʻana like i kā lākou ʻike, aʻo iā lākou i nā mākau hou, a hāʻawi i ke alakaʻi.
Pehea e hiki ai i nā hana extracurricular ke kōkua i ka hoʻoikaika ʻana i ka pilina ma waena o kaʻu mau keiki?
ʻO ke komo ʻana i nā hana like a i ʻole nā hui e hiki ai i kāu mau keiki ke hana i nā hoʻomanaʻo like a hoʻomaopopo maikaʻi kekahi i kekahi. Hāʻawi pū ia iā lākou i nā kumuhana maʻamau o ke kamaʻilio ʻana.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke hōʻoiaʻiʻo i ka pono o nā hana hale ma waena o kaʻu mau keiki?
E hoʻokaʻawale i nā hana me ka ʻole o ke kāne a e hōʻoia i ka hāʻawi ʻana o kēlā me kēia keiki i ka nui o ka hoʻoikaika. Hoʻoikaika kēia i ka manaʻo kūpono a hoʻemi i ka huhū a kōkua i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i nā pilina pili kaikaina.
Pehea wau e aʻo ai i kaʻu mau keiki e hana ma ke ʻano he hui?
E hoʻoikaika i nā kūlana kahi e pono ai lākou e hilinaʻi kekahi i kekahi e hoʻoponopono i kahi pilikia he ala maikaʻi loa ia e kōkua ai i nā kaikunāne e paʻa. He puʻupuʻu paha kēia a i ʻole he hana e pono ai ka hui pū. E kōkua ia iā lākou e aʻo e hui pū a hilinaʻi kekahi i kekahi.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke hoʻoikaika i ka pilina kaikunāne ma waena o kaʻu mau keiki inā he ʻokoʻa ko lākou makemake?
E paipai iā lākou e kaʻana like i ko lākou mau makemake i kekahi i kekahi a e komo i nā hana a kekahi. E kōkua kēia iā lākou e mahalo i ko lākou ʻokoʻa a aʻo i nā mea hou.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke hōʻoia i ka mālama ʻana o kaʻu mau keiki i ko lākou pilina pili i ko lākou ulu ʻana?
E paipai i ke kamaʻilio ākea a me ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ma waena o lākou. Eia kekahi, e hoʻomau i ka hoʻoulu ʻana i nā ʻike like a me nā hoʻomanaʻo i ko lākou ulu ʻana.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke kōkua i kaʻu mau keiki e hoʻoholo i nā paio ma waena o lākou?
E aʻo iā lākou e kamaʻilio i ko lākou mau manaʻo a e ʻimi pū i kahi hoʻoholo. E hōʻalo i ka ʻaoʻao a paipai iā lākou e ʻike i ko lākou manaʻo.
Pehea e hiki ai iaʻu ke kōkua i kaʻu mau keiki e kākoʻo kekahi i kekahi i nā wā pilikia?
E paipai iā lākou e noho ma laila no kekahi i kekahi i nā manawa paʻakikī. Hiki iā lākou ke hāʻawi i ke kākoʻo noʻonoʻo, kōkua kekahi i kekahi i ka hoʻoponopono pilikia, a hāʻawi i ka hōʻoluʻolu.
He makuahine ʻo Shannon Serpette o ʻelua a he mea kākau moʻolelo lanakila a me ka manuahi e noho ana ma Illinois. Hoʻohana ʻo ia i kona mau lā e kākau ai, e kau ana me kāna mau keiki a me kāna kāne, a me ka ʻimi ʻana i kāna leʻaleʻa punahele, ka ʻike metala, i kēlā me kēia manawa hiki iā ia. Hiki ke loaʻa iā Serpette ma writerslifeforme@gmail.com
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