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by Jennifer Shakeel
I write this and laugh. I am a mom that has been there done that… and did I mention I am doing it again. I have a 15 year old, a 12 year old and a 15 month old. Still to this day I have separation anxiety with my oldest! I guess I just don’t like being away from my children… especially for extended periods of time. I miss them. Of course I am not here to talk about parental separation anxiety… though I wonder why no one does that. Here we are going to talk about separation anxiety from the child’s stand point and how you can make it easier.
Separation anxiety is when a child has anxiety from being separated from the caregiver, which is usually the mother. This is a very stressful stage for both parent and child as the parent feels guilty, and the child is scared and experiences anxiety.
From the time a child reaches eight months to the time they are about fourteen months, they get nervous and even frightened when they see new people or are in new places. They see their parents as familiar and safe. When they get separated from their parents, they feel threatened and unsafe. This is a normal stage of development and usually ends when the child is two years old.
How Do Children Get Over Separation Anxiety?
READ More on Parenting a Child Through Separation Anxiety
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Here are some tips to save on School Supplies from More4kids:
Follow these tips to keep more of your money in your wallet as your kids head back to school:School Supplies: Stock up during the sales
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by Jennifer Shakeel
Recently I was speaking with a family friend, whose daughter is one of the cheerleaders for my son’s football team. Her daughter is having a rough time with another little girl on the team who seems determined to make my friend’s daughters life miserable. There has yet to be one game all season long that she has not left the game crying. The little girl picks on her at school as well. I have been trying to offer ideas to my friend to help her daughter. I have even talked to her daughter.
It isn’t that her daughter is weak, or a push over… she is just a nice person. Her parents have done an excellent job on raising her and teaching her that it is better to take the high road. That just because someone is being nasty to you does not mean that you need to be nasty back to them. I completely agree with this, we have done the same with our children. Though we have also tried to instill upon them that taking the high road does not mean that you become someone’s doormat. Today I am offering several parenting tips on how you can help your child stand up for themselves.
Parenting Tip One: Return an Insult with a Compliment
Granted this is going to depend on the situation. In the case of my friend’s daughter it is just a taunting little girl and they are 11 years old. It is important to realize that the bully in this case gets satisfaction over making the “victim” feel terrible. They want to see the person they are tormenting upset, for them it is a matter of putting that person in their place which is beneath the bully. To which I advised that she look at this other little girl when she is being mean and say, “You’re the best xxxx,” with a smile and turn and walk away. Don’t give the tormentor the satisfaction of making you feel like crap, let them know that what they are saying doesn’t bother you.
Parenting Tip Two: Call the Bully Out
Sometimes taking the high road is not about not succumbing to being nasty, it is about calling the bully out for what they are doing. For the daughter of our friend, I advised that she look at her “team mate” and say, “I thought we were a team. Teammates support each other. We don’t have to like each other, but we do need to support one another.” Many times, especially with younger kids, the fact that the bully has never been called on the carpet for their behavior encourages the behavior. So when one person stands up to them and points out what they are doing is wrong it will stop the bullying.READ More on Bullying: Encouraging Children to Stand Up For Themselves
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Recently NBC came out with a brand new drama series. The show's name is "Parenthood" and the show was inspired by Parenthood, the movie, which came out some time ago. The show is an hour long, and as a parent myself, I found the idea of a movie all about parenthood to be quite intriguing. The premiere of the show just aired on Tuesday, March 2nd 2010, and what an interesting show it turned out to be.
Based upon the movie, the show is all about the ups and downs that a family goes through as they struggle through different phases of parenthood. The Braverman family is featured in this drama, which is a large family that is very imperfect and quite colorful.
The parents of the family, Zeek and Camille, have four grown children. Adam, their son is married to Kristina and they are the parents of two children, Haddie and Max. Then there is Julia who is married to Joel, and they have one daughter, Sydney. Sarah is a single mom, parent to Amber and Drew. Then there is Crosby, who is with Jasmine, although not married, and they are the parents of Jabbar.READ More on Parenthood TV Series – A Review for Parents
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We all want the best for our families, and many feel that living green is the way to achieve that goal. We want to save the environment for ourselves and our families and neighbors and friends. The marketplace has introduced lots of green products to extract the green from our wallets. The real goal of going green is to buy less and use less. That is a recession friendly goal, because when you achieve it, you will be spending less.
What are some “green” things that we can do as Parents? Conserve energy in your home and in the rest of your life. Use healthier cleaners, and reusable tools.
Do not just turn your car ignition off when you pick up the kids at school, walk to meet them and walk home with them. This is compatible with the fact that we need to use less gasoline and also that we need to get more exercise. This is setting the tone for a healthy green lifestyle for your kids as well. You get to share the wonders of the walk home, and talk with your kids and hear about their day and marvel at the world around you.
Shopping Green
Shop your local thrift shops or yard sales for children’s clothing, especially. Buy things that are gently used, with a lot of life left in them. Most thrift shops benefit a charity, so you are setting an example of giving back and not wasting things that still have life in them. Buy sweaters, jackets and clothes that are easy to layer, because at home, you are turning down the heat.READ More on Green Parenting: Make It A Family Affair
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That very first loose tooth is something you need to celebrate when it happens to your child. It's a pretty big milestone and opens up a variety of great opportunities for you to teach kids more about dental hygiene. As that first tooth loosens, it's a sign that your child is getting a bit older and sometimes kids aren't too sure they are happy about losing their teeth. The great thing is that if you help them celebrate this time, it will help them to adjust to it and make it fun for them to embrace this new stage in their life. Not sure what you can do to celebrate their loose teeth? Here are some wonderful ideas that you can use to make it an exciting and learning event.
History of the Tooth Fairy
Of course, when children lose teeth in the United States, often they are told about the Tooth Fairy. This is an exciting fable that has been around for many years. Back in Europe, hundreds of years ago, when the baby tooth fell out, they would bury it in the ground, teaching kids that an adult tooth would then grow in it's place. Many other countries across the world had similar fables and myths surrounding the loss of baby tooth. Some felt that baby teeth needed to be buried on the grounds of the church to prevent a curse.
As people began to migrate to America, many of these superstitions and beliefs came along with them. Eventually things changed to burying teeth in small planters, and eventually this changed into having children place the tooth under a pillow where it was replaced with a coin or other treat.
Kids, being curious, wanted to know where their teeth went. This brought about the story of the Tooth Fairy removing their teeth and giving them a treat instead, and so this fable was born. Wondering what happens to those teeth the Tooth Fairy collects? Well, the story goes that all those teeth are turned into starts in the sky.READ More on The Tooth Fairy – Celebrating Loose Teeth
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We all want to be happy, and we want our kids to be happy as well. That is only natural and there are some concrete steps to take to raise happy children.
Raising Happy Children:
1) In order to raise a happy child we need to model what we want our children to be. Present a model of a positive respectful adult, treating your partner, teachers, and community leaders in a positive way. Do not make fun of your partner, he or she is a huge part of how a child sees themselves. Even if you do not always agree with what a teacher or school employee does, disagree in a healthy manner. These adults are the anchors in your children’s’ lives. If you treat them well, your child will as well. He will feel good about himself and these people in his life will reflect his attitude back to him.
2) Your children need to feel confident about the future. Be positive about your job, and do not walk in the front door complaining about the economy and your co workers and boss. Let your kids know that you will have a way to support yourself and them. If you are economizing, remind them that it is a choice to live responsibly, paying the bills before having entertainment. When you need a new job, go ahead and look, but do not make it your child’s problem. Work if you have the opportunity, and value your job, so that you will raise a worker.
3) Praise your children, but not excessively or extremely. Use specific words of praise. Instead of looking at their picture and saying “What an excellent picture. I love it. You are the best” a better comment would be: “I like your picture, tell me about it. I can see it means a lot to you and that you have talent. I like the red bow you put on the dog.” The phrase “Tell me about it” lets them know that you want to hear what is important to them.READ More on Parenting: 7 Secrets to Raising a Happy Child
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February is Teen Dating Violence Prevention and Awareness Month. I will be posting several related articles here with information on empowering our daughters, teaching our sons and making sure that our kids are safe (boys get abused too).
The statistics are alarming. It is estimated that an incredible one out of every three teens experiences abuse, often at the hands of a date or “intimate.” Worse, two out of three teens will never report the abuse. As parents, it is our job to ensure our children’s safety, but what do we do when we can’t be with them? The best thing that we can do for our kids is educate them. If we teach them how to protect themselves and how to not only act in a dangerous situation but also how to detect one, we are well on our way to reducing our child’s risk of enduring dating violence.
I have a teenage daughter and I admit, I worry about her. She is the sweetest, kindest child I have ever seen. She is also incredibly innocent. It would be easy for some guy to take advantage of her.
I have endured domestic violence. I am a survivor. She knows this and I do believe that she is stronger because of it. But there are so many kids out there who are enduring teen dating violence and they feel like they have nowhere to turn.READ More on Teen Dating Violence Prevention Month
by Stephanie Partridge
No one ever said that being a parent was easy. Sometimes we get so busy that our children fall to the wayside. Other times, we get so frustrated that we just want to strangle them! My point is, sometimes we just forget to let our kids know just how much they mean to us. So on this February 14, I am challenging all parents to take one or more of these inexpensive (or free) ways of showing your teen that you love them and apply it to your own family.
Then leave a comment here telling us all about it! We would love to hear about it.
If you haven’t been very expressive to your teen, or you are experiencing a distance, these activities may help bring your teen closer to you. Keep in mind, though, if your teen isn’t accustomed to this type of treatment, they may be apprehensive at first. Don’t give up.
This Valentine’s Day (and every day) commit to giving your teen:
1. An Unexpected Card
I do this for my kids when they least expect it. I will leave a card on their pillow or on their computer or even on the fridge. It doesn’t have to be fancy, just a simple “I love you,” “I’m proud of you” or “YOU ROCK!” Notes are also good. I just learned that my kids have kept all of the cards and letters that I have given them over the years.
2. A Hug
Hugs are the greatest. Psychologists say that a 30 second hug is actually healing. It elevates the mood and strengthens the bond between people. Reach out and give your teen a hug. There doesn’t have to be a particular reason or a special occasion, just do it to let them know that you are there for them and that you love them.
3. Praise
Too many times we forget to praise our kids – but we are often quick to criticize them. I praise my daughter and son for doing their chores without my asking them. I thank them for the things that they do (even if I have had to get on to them to get it done). Kids are people too and acknowledgment of the things they do right is very important. If all they ever hear is what they do wrong, they will be less inclined to do anything at all.READ More on You’re MY Valentine! Ways to Show your Teen that you Love Them
