Nowadays, respect is a rare gift in young men who grew up understanding the virtues of showing respect to the opposite sex. Teaching equality among the sexes is the best gift we can give our kids. If parents would understand the valuable tool their sons will have if they learn early on how to respect women, there would be far happier marriages later in life. Teach boys the fine art of respecting women so when they search for their life partner they will find the best one.
Teach Respect within the Home First
Teaching young men how to respect women starts with their mothers and fathers and how they respect each other. If for example a father does not listen to his wife and show respect, how is the son to react? Kids learn by example. On the other hand, if a woman is aggressive and disrespectful to her husband, chances are her husband doesn’t show her respect either and sons will grow up without this advantage in knowing to respect other women. Before you can train your son to have respect, are you acting in a respectful manner within your marriage? Mom and dad need to have nailed this first and then parents are better able to train their sons. Children need to learn and value 'equality' among men and women.
First, always react to any disrespect from the sons with calmness and patience. If you ground your son for being disrespectful, you have probably spoken harshly and sent them to their room where they can stew in their anger. Before doling a punishment for disrespect, simmer down and think it through before reacting.
If the son is throwing a verbal fit, it’s best not to match his fit by yelling or being angry. That adds fuel to the disrespect fire. Let him finish his fit, let him calm down first. Young men are sometimes easily agitated (thus the term teenage angst) and knowing this will help you to stay calm and ride out his angst until he calms down too. Listen to his ranting, calmly and without interruption. Once he’s done, then approach, calmly, and let him recognize you listened to what he said. But also let him see where you have experienced the disrespect (or saw the disrespect to another woman) and calmly explain that you will not be a participant in talking with them under those circumstances. Tell them you will talk to and help them once they show the proper respect.
Respect is often coupled with a sense of remorse if respect wasn’t shown. Train your son to show this remorse if he reacts in a disrespectful way. You do this by not fueling their disrespect. If they are reacting, ranting, in a disrespectful way, say nothing, do nothing until it’s over. Help them understand why you said or did nothing.
Even the most disrespectful boys can learn respect by seeing examples of the adults in their lives practicing it. Show them if you act disrespectful that you have remorse for doing so. This is vitally important for the father, if he disrespects mom in front of the kids, to show he has remorse and can apologize.
It might help to act out scenarios where dad can play act showing disrespect to mom and then play act how he shows remorse. Show your son how to respect, what to do in different situations. Do this while the young man is calm and listening.
Teach Respect by Showing Respect
So many people are under the assumption that respect is earned when it’s something we should offer our fellow human being simply because they are our fellow human being. With this in mind, parents should show respect to their sons from the start. Don’t respect ill behavior, but respect him first in all the things he does right. Don’t lower your morals and values for this respect, but give him the respect you’d like for him to show you.