Little Girl Pretending She is a Fairy Princess

by Jennifer Shakeel

When you were little didn't you have an imaginary friend, or maybe your bedroom was a huge fortress where your bed was the castle surrounded by a moat and you battled the evil king from another castle… or maybe saved a princess… or maybe you were the princess. The point is that you played and you would use your imagination. Today, not as many children play as much or use their imagination as much as when we were kids… and that may cripple them in the long run.

I know that I am not the only parent that has said to their kids that "When I was little we didn't have cable… or the internet or Play Stations. We were thrown outside when we woke up and weren't allowed back in until dinner." I have said that very thing… more than once… and it is 100% true. We were expected to play, and play meant outside. When you played you were suppose to use your imagination because toys 30 and 40 years ago were nowhere near as animated as they are today. You had to make Barbie talk, and if Barbie had a baby chances are pretty good that you used a tiny little doll or a Play School toy to be the baby. GI Joe's didn't talk, they were tiny little figures, which again is different than when my dad was little and the GI Joe doll was as big (size wise) as Barbie. But to play you had to make it up.

I am sure that what you didn't realize then, just as I didn't, by playing and using your imagination you were actually improving your learning and socialization skills. You were actually using play to cope with the situations that life presented you as you grew up. I would even venture to say that we as adults use make believe to cope with the same things, but many of us won't admit it.

There is a lot of research that has been done that backs up the importance of make believe and play. These are the tools that children use to conquer fears as well as explore their dreams and hopes. When kids play they actually get to use action, they get to initiate action instead of always having to respond to what is happening to them. Many experts term play and make believe the "safe haven" of self expression for children.

The big issue today is the fact that children today don't know how to play… they don't know how to use their imagination. The reason, technology, take a look at this quote taken from an interview with Dr. Susan Linn,

"Q: You write that studies show the time children spend in creative play has diminished over the years. Why?
A: Kids are spending about 40 hours a week engaged with electronic media after school. That's time taken away from creative play. The combination of this screen time and all the toys based on TV shows and movies narrows children's options for make-believe. So do these best-selling electronic toys where all you have to do is push a button, and the toy talks, walks and does back flips by itself. It's like the toy is having most of the fun, but it's not giving children a chance to be creative. When it comes to toys that encourage creative play, less is more. A good toy is 90% child and only 10% toy."

Think about this, most kids today will mope around the house and complain they are bored unless they have a PSP in their hands or an iPod in their ears. If you tell them to go and play they want to get out the Wii which mimics actual outside sports. Though many parents think that the Wii is a better option over other video games because it gets the kids up and moving.

Yes, it does. But think about this. They don't have to go outside to play baseball. They don't have to interact with other people to win a basketball game or tennis match. All the need is a remote control and the television.  So not only are we taking away coping mechanisms, but also the ability to socialize.

Think for a moment about your childhood… and the resilience you had to overcome different obstacles that happened in life. Getting cut from the basketball team, the bully that wouldn't leave you alone in 2^nd grade… wanting to audition for the play but not being able to overcome your stage fright… but at home… when you played, you were the best basketball player on the team, you went home shot hoops played with the pretend crowd cheering your name…  you were the prince the conquered the dragon to save the princess or the small town from being consumed by fire… you were the star of the next Broadway play, where people were moved to tears over your performance.

You worked through your fears and were able to take a stronger stand on your own, and bounce back from defeat because you had a way to work it out. Today kids go home and plug into a violent video game and feel better by blowing people up. And then the next obstacle comes along… and they can't get through it because they haven't learned how to work through their fears or frustrations.

Encourage your kids to play. Let them run around outside, free as birds playing. Don't you remember the sheet tents over the dining room table when you were little… build one with your kids. Get them away from the television. Box up the video games for awhile and encourage your children to have unstructured play time. Play with them. Some of my favorite memories as a child are when my dad would play GI Joes with my sister, brother and I. We would turn the whole house into GI Joe world. We would build our own houses, create a terrain, and come up with a mission. I remember taking the old brown grocery bags, cutting them open and coloring scenery on them for us to use against a wall.

I have tried to do the same with my kids. If you talk to them they have stories to tell already at 15, 11 and 10 months (if she could talk.) They can tell you about the campouts in the living room in a sheet tent. The journeys we would take looking for fairies in the woods… or the stories that we would make up at bedtime so that they could go to sleep. While I now know that I was helping them become stronger more well rounded people, I can also selfishly tell you it was because I wanted them to stay little as long as possible and enjoy what they could do with the world around them.

Encouraging your children to play is important. You wouldn't not send them to school… don't forget to encourage them to play. I am hoping to gain an interview with Dr. Susan Linn so that she can shed more light on how important it is for us as parents to create an environment where imagination and make believe are essential as food, water and love.

Biography
Jennifer Shakeel is a writer and former nurse with over 12 years medical experience.  As a mother of two incredible children with one on the way, I am here to share with you what I have learned about parenting and the joys and changes that take place during pregnancy. Together we can laugh and cry and rejoice in the fact that we are moms!

No part of this article may be copied or reproduced in any form without the express permission of More4Kids Inc © 2009 All Rights Reserved

Hey Moms and Dads, kids love to play, and playtime is a great way to bond and have silly fun with our kids. We need our kids as much as they need us, and the great things about having kids is they can escape from the pressures of daily life. Here are some fun activities that don't have to cost an arm and a leg we can enjoy with our children:

Fun Kids Activities

• How about having a picnic? Requires food out of the fridge and stuff from around the house, use paper plates for easy clean up, spread a blanket out right outside your house and have a picnic. Raining, snowing, or just too darn hot outside? No problem, move the furniture out of the way and have a picnic on the living room floor.
• Go buy a puzzle and make it together. This is a great learning activity. Check out Ann Bowers article on "Teaching with Puzzles". Ann has been an educator for over 20 years and provides great insight on the effectiveness of puzzles in teaching children skills and concepts.
• Go to the local park, playground, garden path, or whatever you have for gathering of children in your area with no admission fees! Even if you go to the local school during “off time” usually weekends and after 6:00 pm on weekdays get some play time in and have a ride on the swings
• Take pictures ~ what better way to see the world through your child’s eyes than to hand the camera and let them snap a few shots. If your kids are like mine, they love it when the camera comes out.
• Play a board game, but be creative and create new rules!!
• Go to the movies. At home! Make a big bowl of popcorn and snuggle up to watch a favorite movie together, remember to turn out the lights for super theater effect.
• You know that video game they like to play? Play it with them, trust me there will be laughing, a lot of it.
• Play hide and seek. Classic, and still fun.
• Draw pictures together and use your imagination to create a story for that picture.
• Here is a very easy and relaxing activity. How about taking a walk …. Anywhere! Around the yard, around the block, just walk chit chat and spend some time together without the bustling noise of video games, televisions, or phones
• Make and fly a kite.
• Make up a song about them…or you…or the dog…or anything! Then sing it of course.
• Teach them to play cards
• Write a story with your child about something crazy and fun!
• This is a great one when you are cooped up in the house: Make a scavenger hunt and hide things around the house.
• Read a book and at the end of the book use your imagination and create alternative endings.

Here are some neat ideas you can do with paper or a paper bag. I bet you never thought that a paper bag could be so much fun.

• Take a class, learn Origami together, and use it for origami projects. Challenging but fun.
• Make a puppet
• Pack a lunch
• Here is an easy one, trying painting a picture on your paper bag and show it to daddy when he gets home.
• Make a book cover
• Recycle it. Or just recycle in general. My son loves taking out bags, newspapers and boxes to the recycle plant. Not only do I make it a fun activity, but it also provides a valuable lesson on conservation
• Try decorating your paper bag with stickers and use it as a gift bag
• Make your own microwave popcorn (kernels, oil, etc… tape shut, microwave)
• Cut it up and make craft labels, scrap book bits, or gift cards from it
• Use it to make paper-mache
• Make a luminary for your yard
• Use it to collect donations for charity

Share your ideas!! Scroll down to the bottom of this page and tell us some fun activities you do with your kids.

DISCLAIMER: Use of these ideas for kids are at your own risk and you as the adult are responsible to make sure you supply the adult supervision needed with each of these ideas. We make no warranty, express or implied, regarding you or your childs individual safety.

Has your child accumulated what seems to be a million toys? The family room is cluttered up, toys are overflowing from their bins everywhere in your house. The worst thing of all is your child seems bored! How can that be?

So he or she is bored. This is a familiar scenario among kids of all ages. Formerly beloved toys sit forlornly in a corner after a few months, weeks, or even days of use. Your child’s lack of interest in his or her toys doesn’t necessarily mean they are spoiled. Rather, they may have used a toy enough that it’s no longer a novelty, and now they’re looking for something else to stimulate their mind.

You can take steps to ensure that your child’s creative juices don’t dwindle away along with the excitement of the toys. In addition, you can breathe new life into those very same toys. Here are some ideas:

One trick is to rotate toys. Keep a batch of older ones in the garage or attic. When your child grows tired of the toys in the house, move them into storage. Bring out the toys you had hidden away. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and toys that your child hasn’t seen in a long time suddenly have renewed appeal.

For younger children, especially toddlers, be creative. Everyday household objects can be fun and inexpensive toys. Give your toddler bits of masking tape, and watch him giggle and laugh as it sticks to his fingers. Try to put water in a glass and blow bubbles through a straw.

Even better, engage your child in activities. Toys are fine, but playtime, especially with mom and dad, is better. Sing songs. Have arts and crafts time using age appropriate washable paint, stickers, craft paper, glue, glitter or even pudding (hint, have your child sit in the tub for the messier activities). Read stories. Be creative. Build a pillow and blanket fort. Older children often enjoy role-playing (e.g., playing house, princess, etc).

Play games. Old standbys like hide and seek, tag, catch, and red light green light still hold appeal.

The benefits to activities, versus toys, are that you’ll spend quality time bonding with your child and stimulate their creative juices. In addition, your children will learn. Taking turns, learning numbers, and music appreciation are just a few of the valuable takeaways.

In addition, many of these activities can take place inside the home on a rainy or snowy day, helping to beat the bad weather blues.

In the end, nothing stimulates a child like an outing. Just breathing fresh air in the backyard can invigorate a child suffering from household boredom. If you can really take an excursion, such as to a park, zoo, aquarium or children’s museum, all the better.

Any change of scenery, even the local mall, is likely to rejuvenate a bored child. If it’s cold outside, bundle up and brave the cold, as long as the temperature isn’t dangerously low. Chances are your toddler is going to have a blast in the snow, and your preschooler is sure to relish a friendly snowball fight.

With the right imagination and creativity, you’re sure to find a way to stimulate and entertain your child, whether or not you have a ton of toys.

Sharing is probably one of the most important lessions you can teach your child. Do you remember the old adage “Sharing is Caring.”? Perhaps we can use this little ditty to explain why sharing is so important. Here are a few ideas that may help teach your child to share.

Children learn by example. Don't forget, you are their best role model. If your child notices that you share with others, it may induce your toddler to do the same. However, kids will be kids, and as such they tend to guard what is theirs with a passion. To this end, perhaps you can utilize these tips:

• Tell your toddler that not sharing may mean his friends will not want to share with him either.
• If your toddler doesn’t want to share, explain why it’s important to share.
• Take the toys in question away; if your toddler doesn’t want to share – then no one will play with the toys.
• Never yell at the toddler, but be firm in your reprimands. Yelling rarely gets you anywhere and does not set a good example.
• If your toddler screams and carries on; give the toddler a time out, or what I like to do is a time in and sit down with your child, talk to him or her and make sure there is not really some other issue that is causing the problem.  
• Thank your child for sharing his toys with others.
• Teach your toddler to think of others and how happy it makes them when they share their toys.
• If other toddlers are invited over, ask your toddler to pick out some toys to put away. But also remind him the toys left out can be shared with everyone.
• Teach by example; show your child how you are willing to share something you own.
• Finally, start very young. When my youngest was just a few months old and could sit up we would start playing a game. I would give him a toy and whenever he gave it back I would smile profusely, say 'thankyou' and give it back to him. Now when we are playing together he routinely shares his toys with me and his big brother.

If everythign fails, remember this is probably a stage your toddler will outgrow. However, it is important to instill in your child that sharing and giving is important. Try not to give in to everything your toddler wants or buy your toddler a present every time you give another child or their sibling a present. Your child is little but also needs to understand the importance of sharing, and how heartwarming it is to share and coorperate with others.

Here are a few ideas to keep your toy box from getting boring and not having to spend a fortune:

• Every 3 or 4 months change the toy box and it will be like having all new toys! (This is my favorite!!)
• When your child wants to buy a toy that you aren’t thrilled about have them make a list ~ why they want the toy and how it benefits them, this will help them see if they really do need or want the toy.
• Use Rubbermaid tubs as your toy box, but instead of buying one buy three and put different toys in each one. Don’t be afraid to let the kids pick what they want in the toy aisle, if it’s a chore give them options “you can get this, that or this” instead of standing in the toy aisle waiting for a decision 
• Find a local trading group and swap your kids outgrown toys for something more age appropriate; sometimes called toy co-ops. 
• Subscribe to the area freecycle list and give away and get some pretty cool toys (and sometimes stuff for mom and dad too!)
• Avoid having too many toys; they’ll get boring, broken, and lost faster than you can say “put your toys away”
• Read product reviews before you go shopping; avoid toys that break easily (certain brands of dolls and action figures are notorious for arms and heads falling off) 

Kids love to plan and Mom and Dad are usually their first and favorite playmades.  By taking time to play with your child, you may find that  it will help build confidence, teach cooperation and taking turns, and also help build a closer, loving, and stronger relationship with your child. When you spend an afternoon playing games with your toddler, you might be surprised at how much fun your time together is for you as well as your child. So grab a board game, bouncy balls, or a beanbag collection and spend the afternoon indulging in a few toddler games!

Making Chores into a Toddler Game

Making Choirs fun at an early age can be a life saver and can help developer a good work ethic as your child grows. You might be wondering how you are going to find time to play with your child between the laundry, cooking and housework that must be completed every day. The good news is that you can find time for toddler games and get your tasks finished at the same time. Young children love to help around the house, and you can turn the most mundane job into a fun and exciting activity for your little one. If you have a mountain of laundry to fold, give your child a pile of socks and ask him to find the matching pieces. If you have baking or cooking to do, allow your child to help measure ingredients and stir your mixtures. It may take a bit longer to complete your chores this way, but the time you and your child spend together will be worth the extra time spent.

Toddler Games that don’t require Supplies

Toddler games do not have to be pricey; in fact, some of these activities do not have to be purchased at all. You can make a game of walking to school by alternating running and skipping, or hopping over the cracks in the sidewalk. Have fun with morning preparations by racing to see who can get dressed first. There are many ways to turn the everyday activities into a game for your toddler. Inexpensive objects that you can keep on hand for toddler games of your own creation include bubbles and wands, balls of assorted sizes, and a collection of beanbags that will find numerous uses.

Board Games to Fight Boredom

When it comes to board games for your toddler, the old standbys are often the best. Candy Land is still a popular choice, and now comes in a variety of themes for your child’s gaming pleasure. Chutes and Ladders is another tried but true, as is Hi Ho Cherry-O and memory games. If your child prefers toddler games of a rowdier sort, Hungry, Hungry Hippos has been delighting this age for generations. Most of these games are educational as well as fun, because they teach skills such as color recognition, counting and early reading. Social skills learned include taking turns, staying on task, and good sportsmanship.

It’s often the case that kids are bored at home with nothing to do and mom can’t face another costly activity. There are lots of fun actitities that don't have to cost an arm and a leg.

Children’s activities don’t have to cost much and they certainly don’t have to be boring.

Here are a few ideas:

Take a trip to the airport. You don’t actually have to go in the airport but you can park close by and spot the airplanes. Talk to your kids about where the airplanes may be going or how many people may be on board. Kids find airplanes fascinating.

Visit the train station. Again, kids are fascinated by anything loud and with an engine. Help them spot the different trains and talk about where the passengers may be going.

Go to the sea side. You don’t have to save the beach for summer breaks only. Go anytime of the year and collect rocks or sea shells. Let your kids play and run on the sand.

Take them to yard sales. Make a morning out of it and have fun. Tell each child they can choose a small toy or item. They can have fun chatting to different people, help you pay for things and even get some good exercise if you walk or take the bikes.

For the older kids, sometimes the best thing can be to let them chill out with a friend; a sleepover with a rented DVD can go a long way. As your children get older, you could try dusting off the hobbies you have hidden in the attic, such as the old hockey stick or the fishing equipment and let them follow in your footsteps.

A little investment in a new hobby for them may be just the ticket to keep them entertained and active. Or if you have a fun activity try to get your child involved. I am starting early with my son. I learned to juggle in my college years and have tried to keep up with it. He just loves going outside with dad and watching him juggle. I am now starting to work on his coordination, playing catch with him and teaching him to throw a ball up and catching it. Juggling with your child can be a lot of fun, however, even if you don't have a hobby you can easily share with your child, find something fun and learn it together! That can make your time together even more enjoyable!

With a little thought and imagination the possibilities for fun and frugal activities are endless. And don’t worry about not spending a lot of money, all that really matters is that you’re spending quality time with your kids.

Many children today have so many toys that they do not even play with half of them, and they lay forgotten in the toy box. Some of these toys are monsters and guns and many of them do not promote learning, but often promote violence.

When picking out toys for your children you should consider the educational value that they hold and how they will affect your children. Giving your child musical instrument toys is a good way to interest them in music at a young age and will perhaps later end up in them choosing to study some aspect of music.

There are various types of musical instrument toys to be found. There are of course drum sets, recorders, toy guitars, and xylophones. All of these musical instrument toys can be found for reasonable prices. There are several places you can find them and one of the best places to go is Toys R Us. You can sometimes find musical instrument toys at Wal-Mart as well however they can be a bit harder to find there sometimes.

Where to Begin?

Giving your children musical instrument toys can teach them a lot about music at a young age. Starting them out with simple rhythm toys is a great idea. With a little help from you they can take those toys and begin to play them with music learning important lessons about rhythm. Little by little, with other musical instrument toys they may begin making up their own little tunes and sometimes words to them as well. Musical instrument toys can light a spark in the heart of a child that will unleash a talent you might have never found otherwise.

If your child does love playing with musical instrument toys, when they reach an appropriate age it is good to think about starting them in some kind of music lessons. Find out what musical instrument toys they like playing with the most and this can help you and your child when making a decision about what instrument to play. If they have spend much of their time as a child playing with musical instrument toys it makes it easy to move them on into music lessons and playing real instruments.

Some parents might cringe when thinking of musical instrument toys because they are far from quiet, and sometimes might leave you with a headache, but the benefits are wonderful. If your child goes on to become a wonderful musician in life all those headaches will soon become worth the pain. Even for those children who might never become professional musicians the appreciation and love for music will be something that stays with them for the rest of their lives, and many will pass on to their children the love for musical instrument toys.

by Michelle Donaghey

Does your child enjoy cooking, playing his saxophone or drawing  characters? If so, work to encourage him or her to develop hidden talents!

Biography

Michelle Donaghey is a freelance writer and mother of two boys, Chris and Patrick, who are her inspiration. She lives in Bremen, Indiana just south of South Bend, home of Notre Dame. When she isn't writing, Michelle can be found in her perennial flower garden or working on small home improvement projects. Michelle has written for parenting publications including Metro Kids, Atlanta Parent,Dallas Child, Great Lakes Family, Family Times and Space Coast Parent and websites including iparenting.com.

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When I was a child my time was spent outside playing “make-believe” in the backyard with my brothers. We focused on doing things that were fun for us, this could include many different things but among them were those games that allowed us to create a world all our own. With today’s youth however it is becoming the norm to just play games that are already created for you. Video games are among the most popular toys children play with. Even toddlers now have video games catering to them. Yes it is great for children to use these games to help with their hand-eye coordination and many other basic functions, and sure they are a lot of fun, but adults need to remember that a lot of a child’s cognitive learning comes from actually creating and developing things for them to act out.

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