Parents do very well to look at themselves first, before anything else. Is there a better way – even a different way – they could be doing something. Stopping a certain behaviour will likely go a long way to improving a situation.

And, directing children to the consequences of their actions is a far more productive avenue than arbitrary punishment. It exasperates children when they can't make things add up – why should "talking back" to Mum have led to losing out on watching my TV program. The one bears no relation to the other. "I don't appreciate being spoken to that way!" is a far more powerful consequence. Parents have to trust that it resonates with children.